Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The Wrath of God

Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell after 9/11

   Pat Robertson had this to say after Hurricane Katrina struck New Orleans and the Southeastern United States killing more than 1,800:

"We have killed over 40 million unborn babies in America," Robertson said on his September 12, 2005, broadcast of  "The 700 Club."
"I was reading, yesterday, a book that was very interesting about what God has to say in the Old Testament about those who shed innocent blood. And he [the author] used the term that those who do this, 'the land will vomit you out.' ... But have we found we are unable somehow to defend ourselves against some of the attacks that are coming against us, either by terrorists or now by natural disaster? Could they be connected in some way?"

   I won't get into the contradictory nature of this comment. Man (Woman) supposedly killed over 40 million innocent babies (babies? Does he mean a cluster of undifferentiated cells, or fetuses? And how does he know they are so innocent?) so God punishes 1,800 people who may or may not have had an abortion, or provided one. I'll wager there was a large percentage of those poor 1,800 that had nothing to do with any abortion antics, so this is a case of God saying to us, do as I say, not as I do (Thou Shalt Not Kill). And I won't even mention the Great Flood (Oooppps! I mentioned it).*

   Pat Robertson said this about the Haitian earthquake which killed approximately 220,000 men, women, and children... some of them innocent.

It "happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it."
The Haitians "were under the heel of the French. You know, Napoleon III and whatever," Robertson said on his broadcast Wednesday (the day after the quake hit). "And they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, 'We will serve you if you will get us free from the French.' True story. And so, the devil said, 'OK, it's a deal.' "
Native Haitians defeated French colonists in 1804 and declared independence.
"You know, the Haitians revolted and got themselves free. But ever since, they have been cursed by one thing after the other. That island of Hispaniola is one island. It’s cut down the middle, on the one side is Haiti, on the other side is the Dominican Republic. The Dominican Republic is prosperous, healthy, full of resorts, etc. Haiti is in desperate poverty. Same island."

   Number one: Napoleon III didn’t come to power until 1848. The Haitian Revolution began in 1791... but whatever.
   Number two: According to Matthew Yglesias of ThinkProgress, Pat must have been referring to what is known as the Bois Caïman Ceremony were native Haitian leaders gathered at the onset of the revolution, where their leader, Boukman recited this prayer:

The god who created the earth; who created the sun that gives us light. The god who holds up the ocean; who makes the thunder roar. Our God who has ears to hear. You who are hidden in the clouds; who watch us from where you are. You see all that the white has made us suffer. The white man’s god asks him to commit crimes. But the god within us wants to do good. Our god, who is so good, so just, He orders us to revenge our wrongs. It’s He who will direct our arms and bring us the victory. It’s He who will assist us. We all should throw away the image of the white men’s god who is so pitiless. Listen to the voice for liberty that speaks in all our hearts.

   Now I may be old and stupid, but I don't see any mention of the devil in there, Christian or otherwise. What I see is a prayer distinguishing two gods, one for evil (Christian God) and one for good (Haitian God), and a wish for blessings and direction and help from their own Haitian god. Now if your a Haitian being subjugated by folks who worship the Christian God, it seems to me it would only be natural to associate that god with evil, and your own with good, and you may want to believe that your god wants you to take up the fight for freedom from oppression before the fight starts. That's what it looks like to me (and Yglesias).
   True story.
   And I won't even mention that when Pat says "And so, the devil said, 'OK, it's a deal.' " I'm wondering what kind of special insight Pat has on devil communications. Is he secretly in league with the devil, and so has the inside scoop on what the aforementioned devil says?
   I think that from the available evidence, he must! At the very least the two must hang together.
   Just saying.
   I don't mean to just pick on Pat... but it's so much fun.
   By the way:
   Someone called in to Pat's show, "The 700 Club," and asked him why do miracles "happen with great frequency in Africa, and not here in the USA?"
   Pat dutifully replied, "People overseas didn’t go to Ivy League schools. We are so sophisticated, we think we’ve got everything figured out. We know about evolution, we know about Darwin, we know about all these things that says God isn’t real, we know about all this stuff."
   According to Pat, advanced education, "skepticism and secularism" in our institutions of higher learning was keeping God from making miracles happen here in the United States.
   Africans on the other hand are "simple" and "humble."
   "You tell 'em God loves 'em and they say, 'Okay, he loves me,'" he said. "You say God will do miracles and they say, 'Okay, we believe him.'"
   So in Pat's view, the dumber, simpler, and humbler you are the better your chances are of seeing some God miracles.
   Pat's right of course. God did kick Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden for eating fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.
   And because of that I know of good and evil, of which I'm writing about right now.
   Here's the transcript from the above clip:

JERRY FALWELL: And I agree totally with you that the Lord has protected us so wonderfully these 225 years. And since 1812, this is the first time that we've been attacked on our soil and by far the worst results. And I fear, as Donald Rumsfeld, the Secretary of Defense, said yesterday, that this is only the beginning. And with biological warfare available to these monsters -- the Husseins, the Bin Ladens, the Arafats -- what we saw on Tuesday, as terrible as it is, could be miniscule if, in fact -- if, in fact -- God continues to lift the curtain and allow the enemies of America to give us probably what we deserve.
PAT ROBERTSON: Jerry, that's my feeling. I think we've just seen the antechamber to terror. We haven't even begun to see what they can do to the major population.
JERRY FALWELL: The ACLU's got to take a lot of blame for this.
JERRY FALWELL: And, I know that I'll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way -- all of them who have tried to secularize America -- I point the finger in their face and say "you helped this happen."
PAT ROBERTSON: Well, I totally concur, and the problem is we have adopted that agenda at the highest levels of our government. And so we're responsible as a free society for what the top people do. And, the top people, of course, is the court system..
JERRY FALWELL: Pat, did you notice yesterday the ACLU and all the Christ-haters, People For the American Way, NOW, etc. were totally disregarded by the Democrats and the Republicans in both houses of Congress as they went out on the steps and called out on to God in prayer and sang "God Bless America" and said "let the ACLU be hanged". In other words, when the nation is on its knees, the only normal and natural and spiritual thing to do is what we ought to be doing all the time - calling upon God.
   Okay, Jerry seems to have forgotten about that little kerfuffle known as Pearl Harbor, and yes, Obama haters, Hawaii is actually one of our 50 states, and Rumsfeld, as far as I know, is not a fortune teller, and even if he was it wouldn't matter because there are no such things as fortune tellers. He could be an educated guesser, but if he knew so much why didn't he prevent the attacks of 9/11 from happening in the first place, especially since he and Bush, and a whole bunch of others had been warned? And how does he know biological weapons were then available to terrorists, and why didn't they use them instead of planes?
   But Rick, you ask, why are you picking on someone who can't defend themselves because their dead?
   Because his words and ideas still exist in print and other media which still influence many others. If those many others wish to debate me I'd be more than happy to do so.
   Let's continue.
   Falwell also seems to believe, like many still do, that God is an American, and therefore shows a special preference toward this wonderful country of ours. There's many reasons why this shouldn't be true. Let's try this one.
   As we all know the Earth is somewhere between 6,000 to 10,000 years old, and according to Genesis, which is a book in the Bible, God got busy right away making Adam and Eve, with the result being the entirety of humanity, and thus we are all God's children... even the Dutch. So what's up with God favoring the United States of America over France, let's say, or Rwanda, or China, and especially those Buddhists in Sri Lanka, on and on, even though those misguided Rwandians, Chinese and Buddhists may not believe in the God of Christianity?
   Well, I'm waiting.
   So in actuality what we see in the real world is God's impartiality, an impartiality displayed by God doing absolutely nothing, certainly not manifesting Him/Her/It's self in any way, or providing other signs of intervention... as He/She/It has always done throughout history (except biblical times of course, Old Testament times. God was all over the place during those times. You couldn't get God to shut up, or go home. Quite frankly God made a nuisance of Him/Her/It's self back then).
   God minds God's own business.
   Boy, this was all from Falwell's first paragraph. Keep in mind Robertson is pretty much just agreeing with Jerry, just like the little asshat that he is.
   Next Falwell blames the American Civil Liberties Union for 9/11. Well he may be right on that one. Any organization which is dedicated to protecting the civil liberties of Americans, even the civil liberties of Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson, must be God hating devil lovers. They even admit it themselves in their own stated mission: "to defend and preserve the individual rights and liberties guaranteed to every person in this country by the Constitution and laws of the United States."
   I'll have to give Jerry a pass on that one.
   Next he also blames our own federal court system for preserving the separation of church and state who take seriously the Establishment Clause located in the First Amendment of the United States Constitution. Everybody knows the founders were just kidding about that, I mean really...
   Next up it's the abortionists who are mocking God somehow. They make God mad by killing those 40 million clusters of undifferentiated cells. Jerry must be on the phone to God like constantly because he certainly knows what God's up to.  
   Then it's the pagans like me. Now I'm responsible for 9/11! I have witnesses that can place me in North Hollywood, California on the 11th of September in 2001. Oh! I know what Jerry means. He means that God is so mad at people like me for not believing in Him/Her/It, that He/Her/It lifted their veil of protection allowing those 19 al-Qaeda terrorists to kill 2,977 innocent people.
   Gee, like Boukman I don't think I like this God.
   Oh yes, I'm also a card carrying member of the ACLU, so I'm doubly at fault. This sucks.
   Let's not forget those feminists, and the gays and the lesbians, and People For the American Way, whose mission statement holds: "People For the American Way is dedicated to making the promise of America real for every American: Equality. Freedom of speech. Freedom of religion. The right to seek justice in a court of law. The right to cast a vote that counts. The American Way." They all helped make this happen by pissing off God.
   Sons of bitches!
   And NOW! The National Organization of Women who've been "Taking action for women's equality since 1966." We certainly don't want that.
   And neither does God apparently.
   Might as well throw in the ASPCA while were at it, with all of those obviously pagan Christ hating schnauzers, and the Satan loving tabbies.
   Upon reflection it would appear that Falwell and Robertson blame any and all organizations that don't follow their own agenda. Just saying... again.
   And I certainly don't wish to imply that these two guys are the only ones who blame the victims of natural disasters and terrorist attacks on American political and social policies. Oh no! There are many others.
   From Wikipedia:

Various Christian, Jewish and Muslim religious leaders claimed that Hurricane Katrina was God's punishment on America, New Orleans or the world for any of a variety of alleged sins, including abortion, sexual immorality (including the gay pride event Southern Decadence), the policies of the "American Empire", failure to support Israel, and failure of black people to study the Torah.

 Yehuda Levin, a Jewish religious leader, linked the Haitian earthquake to gays in the military via an alleged Talmudic teaching that homosexuality causes earthquakes.

Third-wave charismatic preacher Cindy Jacobs, of the Generals International ministry, linked the 2011 earthquake in Japan to the United States' Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy regarding gays in the military, quoting the non-canonical Book of Josiah to support her claim.

Chaplain John McTernan said that Hurricane Isaac, like Hurricane Katrina, was God's punishment on homosexuals. Buster Wilson of the American Family Association concurred that statement

McTernan also said that Hurricane Sandy may have been God's punishment against homosexuals. In addition, WorldNetDaily columnist William Koenig, along with McTernan himself, suggested that American support for a two-state solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict led to the hurricane.

   Not to be out done, certifiably crazy person Rep Michelle Bachmann said this concerning a rare east coast earthquake and Hurricane Irene: "I don't know how much God has to do to get the attention of the politicians. We've had an earthquake; we've had a hurricane. He said, 'Are you going to start listening to me here?' Listen to the American people because the American people are roaring right now. They know government is on a morbid obesity diet and we've got to rein in the spending."
   Apparently God is just worried to death about the U.S. deficit. Who knew?
   Michelle did.
   On and on.
   If I didn't know any better I'd say all of these people we're just using God to advance their own agenda. Unfortunately, probably millions of Americans take to heart what these shameless lunatics say.
   Well two can play at this game.
   The Giant African Land Snail is a really big snail, or an air-breathing terrestrial pulmonate gastropod mollusk in the family Achatinidae if you prefer. They are the second biggest snails I've ever seen.
   The adult snails have a height of around 2.8 inches, and their length can reach 7.9 inches or more. They like to eat a lot... and have baby Giant African Land Snails, producing about 1,200 eggs a year.  They are recognized as a serious pest organism affecting agriculture, natural ecosystems, commerce, and human health because they carry a parasitic rat lungworm that can cause illness in us, including a form of meningitis. They are currently invading southern Florida. More than 1,000 of the snails are being caught each week in Miami-Dade, and about 117,000 total since 2011. Like swarming African Fire Ants they eat pretty much anything that's in their path, including the stucco in people's homes. They are also invading Caribbean countries, like Barbados, Jamaica and the Dominican Republic.
   I talked to God last night while sleeping and He/She/It told me that they brought on the snail invasion because Florida allowed George W. Bush to steal the 2000 election, which allowed him to become President of the United States, which allowed him to start two unnecessary wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, which killed over 8,000 innocent coalition forces and countless civilians.
   The connection to Barbados, Jamaica, the Dominican Republic, and the other Caribbean countries currently inundated and the election of George Bush is so obvious I won't even bring it up.
   "I will execute terrible vengeance against them to punish them for what they have done. And when I have inflicted my revenge, they will know that I am the LORD," God said.
   So take that Florida, and don't let it happen again!

Study: Belief in an angry God associated with variety of mental illnesses

*Reference Mark Twain's "Letters From the Earth"

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