Monday, March 31, 2014

Happy Birthday Kate Micucci!

Picture Legend:

1. Ms Kate
2. Painting
3. Little, tiny skiing Kate
4. Nazareth Area High School
5. Tower of Men
6. BangBang
7. Sand Frog
8. Sand Pig
9. Giant Sand Dog, with attached children
10. Ms. Micucci
101 Scrubs
12. Students
13. During the tough early years when Kate and Riki had to share the tub
14. “Imaginary Larry”
15. Relaxing
16. Standing around
17. Swingers
18. Playing
19. The Loophole
20. Slimed
21. Saturday night in the studio
22. Princess
23. Displaying her ability to levitate (show off)
24. This is what comes up when you Google “Kate Micucci Hot.” Kate with Brandon Hardesty
25. This is from “Kate Micucci on WikiFeet”
26. This is what pops up when you Google “Kate Micucci on a bus that has been attacked by Godzilla near Capital Records.”
27. Before the attack
28. On “The Big Bang Theory”
29. Kate going on a boat
30. Artwork
31. More artwork
32. Smile

   This morning it is my great pleasure and honor to give a great big happy birthday shout out to one of my favorite actresses, comedians, performers, musicians, and half of the mega group Garfunkel and Oates (Riki Lindhome is Garfunkel, Kate is, uuhhh, let’s see... Oates), the lovely and incomparable Ms. Kate Micucci (pronounced “my - coochie”)!
   She’s so cute... and nice, just look at those pictures above (she may be a secret ax murderer for all I know, but I’m willing to bet $5 that she isn’t).
   Kate was born on this day in 1980, which makes her, uh, carry the ought, times pi, plus a Eigenvalue Problem value, minus the dividend from Walgreens, uh, 29. Like my lovely ex-case manager Erin, Kate was born at a very early age as a small female infant in New Jersey, which is one of our 50 states here in the U.S., a state where there is no political corruption or retribution, or organized crime of any kind. 
   When she was four years old Kate’s mother began teaching her how to play the piano, or the  pianoforte if you prefer, which is a musical instrument played using a keyboard, unlike the ukulele and kazoo, instruments she would become closely associated with in later years.
   It is said that she left New Jersey when she was eight, and was raised in the city of Nazareth, which is the is the largest city in the North District of Israel. Jesus Christ was raised there as well, and it was the birthplace of the Mother Mary. Today the population is made up of Arab citizens predominantly, which is rather odd, as all of my sources indicate that the name Micucci is of  Italian origen: patronymic or the plural form of a pet form of the personal name Mico, a short form of Michele, and... what’s that Herkimer? Pennsylvania? What about Pennsylvania? Oh!
   I’ve just been informed that Kate was raised in Nazareth, Pennsylvania, rather than Israel, which actually makes a bit more sense. As most of you know Nazareth, Pennsylvania is a borough in Northampton County, in the  Lehigh Valley region of the state, and approximately 8.7 miles north of Bethlehem, where Jesus was born, and 81.7 miles northeast of Lancaster (where my old navy buddy Dave Cornman lives and golfs), and for some obscure reason is considered part of the New York City metropolitan area.
   Of course the whole state is now controlled by the Amish Mafia. 
   Kate liked to play in the woods as a child, where she smoked a corn cob pipe, and where her dad shot poor defenseless deers who were dating.
   In 1998 she graduated from Nazareth Area High School, along with fellow musician Jordan White. Perhaps they knew each other.
   Kate moved on to Keytstone College (a small private, competitive, liberal arts college, where they taught Kate liberal things, like painting, making puppets, and Fine Arts (Fine art, from the 17th century on, has meant art forms developed primarily for aesthetics, distinguishing them from applied arts that also have to serve some practical function. Historically, the 5 main fine arts were painting, sculpture, architecture, music and poetry, with minor arts including drama and dance. Today, the fine arts commonly include additional forms, such as film, photography, conceptual art, and printmaking. -Wikipedia)) in La Plume Township, where she earned an A.A. degree (Associate in Arts degree). 
   And like many young people first out on there own Kate briefly moved to Hawaii  in order to  water the banana and pineapple plants they have there because they were thirsty.
   And after that, around 2001 or so, she moved right across the mighty Pacific to Los Angeles, and attended  Loyola Marymount University, which is a private, co-educational university in the Jesuit and Marymount traditions (“The distinctive character of Loyola Marymount is enhanced by the Jesuit and Marymount educational traditions of its founding religious orders—the Society of Jesus, the Religious of the Sacred Heart of Mary and the Sisters of St. Joseph of Orange.“ How St. Joseph snuck in there I have no idea), where she earned her B.A. degree (Bachelor of Arts) in Studio Art (the making of visual art (such as painting, puppets, drawing or sculpture), contrasted to the study of art history).
   Above are some examples of Kate’s art.
   I had the pleasure recently to be interviewed for a project produced by some intrepid students from Loyola Marymount on the rooftop of the famous Charles Cobb Apartments near the corner of 5th Street and San Pedro. The beautiful Los Angeles skyline was our backdrop. I was asked questions concerning some myths and facts about homelessness, as I am recognized as a world renowned expert on that subject. 
   I told these young people that I was currently working on a piece about a former alumni of theirs, and asked them if they had ever heard of Kate. 
   “Really,” I said. “She’s an actress and comedian. A musician. Garfunkel and Oates? Plays the ukulele?”
   “Really? From LMU?”
   Apparently Kate kept a low profile as a student.
   “By any chance,” I asked, “have you heard of Riki Lindhome, her partner.”
   “Riki Lindhome? Yeah, sure.”
   “The blonde...”
   One of the guys said, “Oh yeah, she was in the movie... the shower scene in “Hell”
   “Yes,” I said. “She was in that and many other fine films as well.”
   Another guy agreed with his fellow student. “Yes, I saw that too. And don’t forget that scene in ‘The Last House on the Left.’ I’m a big fan.” 
   So Ms. Micucci, if you happen to read this, and I don’t see why you shouldn’t as I’m going to post it to your Facebook page, you know what to do. 
   You can’t let Riki get away with this unwarranted adoration. 
   Your public awaits (at least some guys from Loyola Marymount do).
   As far as we know since Kate graduated she has lived in L.A. ever since,  roaming the cities back allies in search of ex-mariachi musicians who can sing “La Bamba.” 
   In 2006 she began her long and successful acting career, and began appearing in television commercials, and guest starring on such shows as “Malcolm in the Middle,” “How I Met Your Mother,” and a recurring role on the short lived sitcom, “Four Kings” (which was one king more than the movie starring George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg).
   2007 saw her starring in the film short “Beat the Street,” and the T.V. shows “Campus Ladies,” and Disney’s “Cory in the House.”
   She started making movies in 2008, playing alongside Matthew Broderick in “Finding Amanda” (she was not Amanda), and with fellow ukulele player, William H. Macy in, “Bart got a Room” (which I just finished watching for the first time a few hours ago. Ms. Micucci was wonderful... and hot).
   At some point Kate and Rikki took some time off from the grueling production schedule in order to tape “It’s Time to get Laid,” which nobody can really argue with.
   And she appeared on the Conan O'Brien show, here and here.
   In 2009 she won a recurring role on the medical comedy  sitcom “Scrubs,” portraying ukulele playing lawyer Ted’s girlfriend, Stephanie Gooch. 
   And around this time, as legend has it, Kate met Riki at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater in Los Angeles, where they were introduced to one another by the comic Doug Benson. They soon began to work together, and made Riki’s short film, “Imaginary Larry.”
   I’ll let them tell the story, here.
   Kate used one of Garfunkel and Oates first songs, “Fuck You,” on one episode of “Scrubs,” here, changing the lyrics a little.
   Here’s the new and improved version of “Fuck You.”
   And some more Garfunkel and Oates here, here, and here.
   They have a lot more songs and videos which you can check out (this message is especially for the students at  Loyola Marymount). Here’s a link to their website.
   And here’s a link to a two hour interview with Kevin Pollock. And here's Kate's website.
   Like Riki, Kate continued with her acting career after Garfunkel and Oates was founded and prospered. In August of 2009, she appeared in an advertising campaign for Hillshire Farms, because she likes  smoked sausage and Polska Kielbasa maybe, and for H & R Block in January 2010, because everybody likes to pay their taxes.
   Also in 2010 Kate starred in “When in Rome,” with fellow actors Kristen Bell, Anjelica Huston, Alexis Dziena, Kristen Schaal, Peggy Lipton, and the lovely and talented Danny DeVito. 
   This is a film I saw for the first time just last Friday night while experiencing a nice 5.1 earthquake. At the time I thought to myself, “Boy, Kate’s really good in this.”
   She also appeared in 12 episodes of “'Til Death,” and one of “Weeds,” that promiscuous marijuana show with Mary Louise Parker. 
   She’s been on or in lots of other things, like “Psych,” “Motorcity,” “Easy to Assemble,” “Bored to Death,” voice work on “Out There,” “Key and Peele,” the film “Rudderless,” starring and directed by that ukulele playing fool, William H Macy, and the T.V. shows “The Big Bang Theory,” and “Raising Hope.”
   Kate at one time performed a live action show, “Playing with Micucci" on the third Monday of the month at the Steve Allen Theater on Hollywood Boulevard, which happens to be in  Hollywood. I don’t think she does that anymore on a regular basis, being such a big star and all, but you can check out her website to see what it is she’s up to. 
   One last farewell song, with Garfunkel and Oates, and their friends Jill Sobule, and Marina V, about the end of the world, here.
   And here’s something interesting. The Urban Dictionary’s definition of  micucci:
“A reallly sexy thing that does not realize how truly hot it is. Makes for an excellent lover, kisses have been known to send victim into uncharted euphoric states, and has a natural unexplainable beauty that can only be described as hypnotizing. Frequently inter-fluctuates between various modes of cuteness, heavenliness, sexiness, adorableness, attractiveness, and perfectness. Despite its delectable nature, its personality flows naturally down the throat like tasteless, pure water. After hypothetical digestion, immediately causes severe cases of butterfly-stomach, perhaps due to its intimidating aura of attractive intelligence.”

Promituella:I am looking for a sexy pants that is also a sexy thong and is also a sexy bra. Can you find me one of those? 
Emmanuolazarr: Yes. It is called micucci. It is the best thing ever.”

   Well, I have no idea who Promituella and Emmanuolazarr are, but I couldn’t agree more.
   And all of us here at Joyce’s Take wish Kate and her family and friends, continued good health and fortune, and of course, a very happy birthday!
   Happy birthday Kate!

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