Monday, April 5, 2010

Yoga 2




Last Tuesday I made breakfast for my lovely case manager, Erin. We've been having breakfast together on Tuesday mornings, and either go out to McDonalds, Starbucks, or IHOP. Erin never lets me pay when we go out though... I don't know why. She thinks I'm poor or something. So the last time we went to Starbucks I told her I'd make us breakfast next week. "That way I'll know I paid for it," I told her.
Anyway, last Tuesday morning I was in my box minding my own business when my phone rang.
"Hi Rick." It was Erin. She hadn't arrived at work yet, but was on her way, and she asked me what we were going to do for breakfast that morning.
"Don't you remember, I was going to make us breakfast today."
"Yeeeaaaaahh," she said, quite emphatically I might add.
"Are you here now?" I asked.
"Nope."
"Okay, when will you be here?"
"Ahh, about ten minutes."
"Okay. I'll meet you downstairs."
"Okay," she said cheerily, and we hung up. I resumed minding my own business for about two more minutes when my phone rang again.
"Hello?"
"Hi Rick." It was Erin. I experienced a moment of deja vu , slapped myself a couple of times, then said, "Hi Erin."
"I'm going to get some McDonald's coffee. Do you want some?"
"Sure." She said she would get me some with some McDonald's cream to go with it.
I waited around an appropriate amount of time then went downstairs.
Erin soon came to the front door, coffee in hand.
"You're here early today," I told her. "You're not sick are you?"
"Very funny."
Once in her office I laid out all of the breakfast possibilities.
"Okay, I've got eggs, I've got cheese, I've got bacon, sausage, both patties and links, I've got ham, I've got pancakes, tortillas, bread. I've got hash browns..." It was true, I had all those things.I've got enough food in my box to get me through a small nuclear exchange with North Korea.
"Wow," Erin said.
"What would you like out of all of that stuff, anything you want."
"Well, a breakfast burrito sounds good, but then I love your breakfast sandwiches..."
I am renowned for my breakfast sandwiches, thats true.
"What kind of bread do you have?" she asked. Picky.
"Sprouted, flourless, whole wheat, berry bread," I told her.
"Uuummmm, sounds good. I was afraid you'd have just plain icky white bread." Picky and prejudiced.
"Breakfast sandwich then?"
We agreed on a breakfast sandwich with egg, cheese and bacon.
"I'm so excited, Rick." It doesn't take a whole lot to get my case manager excited.
I returned to my box, made the sandwiches, then returned to her office, where we dined.
"So I can really learn about current events by watching these comedy shows?" Erin asked me.
"Sure."
"I love this country!" she exclaimed.
Erin has suddenly taken an interest in international and national news. I don't know why. I told her she can easily learn what is happening by watching "The Daily Show," and "The Cobert Report," which she certainly can, and be entertained while doing it. I forgot to mention though that she would be learning current events with a possible progressive tilt. I considered that with her dad and boyfriend, she'd been subjected to enough conservative bulls- - t.
"Which show would be best to watch for me, Rick?"
"Oh, probably the Daily Show."
Which she picked up the previous evenings broadcast on her computer. So we watched Jon Stewart while munching our nice breakfast sandwiches.
"I love this sandwich, Rick. It's the best one you've made for me yet," she said.
"Aaahhh, you're just saying that because it's true."
We were watching Stewart and his cohorts destroy the Republicans for all of their incendiary remarks they've been making lately after the passage of President Obama's Health Care Reform Bill, when there was a knock on the office door.
"Come in!" Erin yelled.
It was Hardy, that bastard. My arch rival.
"Eating sandwiches, huh?" he said. Pretty quick on the uptake that Hardy is.
"Yes, and watching the Daily Show," Erin said. "Want to sit down?"
"Sure."
So, once again Hardy stole my breakfast time with Erin from me. There is no end to his cruelty.
We continued eating. Erin chuckled a few time while watching. I hope she continues her education.
"I can't finish my sandwich. Do you want the rest of this Hardy? It's good." My case manager eats like a little bird.
"Sure. I'll eat it later," Hardy replied. He's so smooth.
I finished eating, and cleaned up. "Alright Erin. I'll let you get to work."
"Thanks Rick. That was great. See you at yoga."
"See you at yoga," I told her. Hardy and I left.
To be continued.

No comments:

Post a Comment