Sunday, April 12, 2009


Today is Easter Sunday, in which the Christian world celebrates the resurrection of Jesus Christ three days after being crucified by the Romans, the core belief upon much of Christianity is based.
I understand that this is a very solemn holiday for many of my fellow citizens, so I won't go into the fact that being revived from a dead state of being has never, never, been verifiably documented, and that extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. I just won't go into it.
In a world in which death is imminent it is understandable that most people hope there is a heaven where they will live in paradise for all of eternity. I myself would love to be immortal just so I could see how things turn out. But nothing is eternal. Not the Earth, our solar system, the cosmos, or the human race. All things end in some form.
It is of some satisfaction to me that I have the ability to be aware that the atoms that currently make up my physical being will survive my death and will be eventually be re-vitalized in some other form, possibly in another living being, however I know for certain that no part of my personality will exist after my demise. That is one reason writing is so important to me. It is the only real and authentic record of my ever being here. Of who I am.
The universe is expanding. There will be a time, a trillion years from now, much after the sun has swallowed our planet, that there will be no stars in the sky to see other than which resides in our local galatical group. They will have receded from us to a extant that they are no longer visible, forever lost to us. Our great galactic neighbor, Andromeda, will merge with the Milky Way, and the monster black holes that reside in the galaxies core will battle for dominance. At some point in the distant future everything that ever was, that was made from atoms, will be inside a black hole. But black holes will not exist forever as they emit a form of radiation, Hawking Radiation, and will themselves dissipate and cease to exist.
Many have asked me how I can live in a world that has no god. I have a friend, Robert, one of my neighbors, who admonishes me for not being a Christian. I have at times had many theological arguments with him, and I always ask him the same thing. Prove it. Prove that there was an ancient person who died for my sins, and will give to me ever lasting life if I only have faith. He often replies that my being alive is all the proof that there needs to be, which unfortunately is no proof at all. I say unfortunately because I wish in my heart of hearts that it were true, and that I could exist in some way forever.
There is just no evidence for it. Not one little bit. Just like UFOs, I wish there was, but there isn't. How can I base my world view on a myth? Blind Faith is a good name for a rock band, but not a realistic view of how the world works.
Billions take solace in religion, I understand that. But I don't know anybody who would would buy a used car with the amount of evidence that was available for the vehicle's quality that there is available for the exitance of a divine being that is interested in everything that I do, and will give to me eternal life after my death. Why do I have to go through that death part anyway? That's always such a hassle.
It certainly is not easy living in a predominantly Christian society holding the beliefs that I do. It would be much easier to join the herd and follow Christianty's path. My lovely case manager, Erin, who I am obviously extremely fond of, involves herself in church related activities on a regular basis, and I would love to be able to share that experience with her, to have that in common. I can not.
To me the world doesn't need a god to be able to function. I say the following each day as a form of mantra: (my esteemed yoga teacher, Beth, will be so proud of me) "The universe is evolved, not created, and functions according to law, not according to the caprice of any gods."
That's a Buddhist saying. And that is the only organized religion on this planet that does not require a god, and so I've spent a great deal of my life studying it's philosophy, as it is very helpful in living on a day to day basis. I also say this each day: "Buddhists are taught to show the same tolerance, forbearance, and brotherly love toward all men (and women), without distinction, and an unswerving kindness toward members of the animal kingdom." I can get into that.
I love nature, that's my god. I study it, and go to wherever the evidence takes me, no matter what I wish were true. To me looking at a clear night's sky, the luminescent stars, the majesty of the cosmos, the beauty of life and self-awareness, is all I need to help me through life, and how I should behave.
And I do not fear death, although it does piss my off. I die each night when I go to sleep.
One day though I will go to sleep for eternity and without dreams. If I had the capacity then I would miss this world, for it's the only world I've ever known, despite all of it's troubles.

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